Sunday, 17 April 2011


Alhamdulillah. Things are going well. Things are going smoothly. I can't complain.

Mr RedBerries and I are well. Alhamdulillah. Parents are meeting, sorting out engagement parties (yeuch), Nikkah ceremonies, and massive celebrations where they can invite any other asian person they ever lay eyes on.

*shrugs* Can't say I'm a massive fan of some of the ideas that have been floating about, but khair, you only get to do it once, so might as well let the parents do as they like.

Mr RedBerries spends a lot of time with his friends. All his time with his friends.

Don't get me wrong, I am in NO way suggesting that he should spend that time with me. I already think we spend a tad too much time together. I guess that's another much time is too much time?

We try and see each other once a week, but sometimes we can't, just because major timetable clashes. That's cool, I don't cry myself to sleep about it. Even if we do see each other, it's usually for only two or three hours. Man. That sounds like a pretty long period of time when you calculate it out. But it's mainly doing nothing. We're not dating.

We're not going to the cinema, we're not going out for coffee, we're not doing anything remotely exciting. Just hanging out, doing nothing, usually down the park. Because that's the only public place where we can hang out doing nothing. Talking about everything and anything. Sometimes, not often, not saying anything at all.

Part of me thinks that it's cool and it's okay. Another part of me feels a bit ... uneasy. Like a tiny piece of me. We're not technically doing anything wrong. But maybe I'm giving too much of myself away too quickly? A girl should be protecting herself and her modesty. Not that I'm immodest (as far as I'm aware), it's just letting a guy get to know you, then you are letting him into an inner circle that normally he wouldn't be allowed to get to know.

Mr RedBerries is very open and honest. Sometimes a tad too open and honest, and I have to stop him talking. Bless his socks, he's always very apologetic. Sometimes I don't think he realises what he's saying. But it's hard. When you know those feelings are there, but you can't say or do anything. I never wanted to be one of those girls who gets engaged and then spends all her time speaking to her fiance. That would be my ultimate lame.

Because even though we have made the intention to make that commitment, we haven't actually made the commitment. Islamically (and this is my basic knowledge), there isn't really such a thing as an engagement. So we're still strangers. I know in Arab culture, they have an Okud, which is the Nikkah ceremony, done as soon as possible. This is classed as the 'engagement'. My parents are not so keen on this. To be honest, neither am I.

Oh my. I've written about something completely off tangent from my original though. Nay mind :)


1 comment:

Frogs and Lilies said...

You've got a very interesting blog! I'm sucked in! :D

I share your opinion about girls spending all their time speaking to their fiance being lame, however, it is pretty vital. It's all about building foundations and common ground from which the rest of your lives will be built on, if you don't devote time to that will be worse than lame, right?

Anyway, that my penny's worth.